Robins and Malfoy?
Blah blah blah, pureblood, respectable, blah. As mismatched as the pair is, you’d know it’s doomed to be just another dull marriage. Rather predictably, Scorpius
SoupMalfoy has plans and only our little Robin can fulfil them. Pity, she’s such a pretty thing. He has plans to marry her after school, gotta get on to the baby making. Not like there’s a rush or anything, pureblood are a dying bred. Now - before this loveless engagement bored everyone to tears - does Robins agree? I don’t believe she has much of a choice but, wonder if she has someone on the side. Or is it Malfoy that does?
Derek Lowe Suspended for Sexual Harassment
As if we hadn’t see this one coming. Derek Lowe, self-proclaimed “lady’s man”, has been suspended for sexual harassment. His victim, Carmen Wild, had attacked him with Sectumsempra after Derek continually pressed his unwanted attentions on the poor dear.
Wood and Richards are back on
You have to wonder if all the frogs that infested the castle had been a part of Grayson Wood’s wooing technique. Whatever the fuck, it seems to have worked. They were caught in a cupboard together.
Poppy Till and Deacon McLaggen, budding romance?
The pair were witnessed going into the Slytherin sixth year girl’s dormitory, to my utter horror and disgust. Maybe Till is just taking advantage of the naive little boy; maybe she’s using him as payback for the grudge his twin holds against her. Whatever it is, I wouldn’t put it past Till. She is proudly part of Soup’s “mindless minions.”
Brandon D’Eath: Bastard son of a Deatheater
Yet his mother couldn’t even think of a decent last name for the kid. Go figure.